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The Day We Lost Our Mum

  I remember the day our mum passed in December of 2011 like it was yesterday.   Mum had always just been there and it was unfathomable that one day, she wouldn’t.   Life wasn’t easy for mum and when I look back, there are so many things I wish I could have done differently to make her passing more peaceful.   I wish we had chosen different music for her funeral; I wish I had been by her bed right at the end; I wish we could have taken her outside one last time instead of being stuck in that awful ICU; so many things I wish I could have changed. And if only she’d had a few more years on this earth.   If only she could have seen our kids start school; if only she’d been here for the birth of our youngest, if only…. Everything seemed so unfair for the longest time; even now, it hardly seems fair that our kids have grown up without knowing their Nan.   That has been the biggest disadvantage of being the youngest child in my family!   All of my siblings’ kids grew up with mum around
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Best Work Ever From My Mum

My mum has been gone now for eleven years this December.   We all miss her terribly, every single day and the story of dealing with the grief from that is a blog for another day.   For today, I wanted to honour her memory by sharing some of mum’s classic phrases, which my siblings tried desperately to prevent their children from ever repeating!!! Suggesting what the kids can do when they’re bored : “ Stand on your head and fart ‘Springtime in the Rockies!” I only recently realised the reference to John Denver, of whom mum was a huge fan! What to say to the kids when they are shitting you: “ Do you want it (your face) slapped or (your arse) kicked?” “I might kick your arse.” The classic rhyme to teach the Grand Kids: Captain Cook done a poop behind the kitchen door.  A bit of glass Stuck up his arse And made him do some more.   Random rhymes that Mum would say because she could: “ Look into my eyes you big black bastard! Your eyes shine like two cats’ arses.   Your l
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Take a Deep Breath...And Be Kind

Given the title I’ve chosen for my blog, I thought it appropriate to put something out there about just that: being kind. In a world that has categorically lost much of its sanity and common sense at the moment, it’s more important than ever that we show each other some kindness and compassion. It’s human nature to make judgements about people; we do it automatically when we first meet someone. The problem is when we start making assumptions and judgements about people whom we don’t know. And again, it’s human nature! We all do it, most of the time we’re not even aware that we are doing it.   Sometimes though, we need to take a step back and make a huge effort to refrain from passing our judgement on others. Because the bottom line is, we just have no idea of what any person might be going through at any given time.   I can recall some random person telling me to “keep your kid under control” when walking through a shopping centre a few   years ago, all because my three year
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The joys of sleep issues….

Our daughter just turned eleven years old last month.   She is a bright, intelligent, funny girl who has great creativity and commitment to her studies. The big problem is that she can’t sleep. She has not been able to sleep in her own bed for consecutive nights for probably two years now.   We start her off in her own bed, but she inevitably ends up in with us.   She is too scared to sleep by herself. We sent her off to ten sessions with the school psychologist last year but that was a waste of time.   The feedback was that she was scared of the bad guy in the Incredibles 2 movie and that was allegedly the root of the problem.   But she had not been sleeping properly for some months prior to even watching that movie.   So to me, that was not the underlying cause of the problem. I took her to our amazing crystal healer.   Our older son had responded really well to this treatment but for our daughter, it didn’t work.   This just goes to show that what works for one child isn'
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Dealing with Kids' Mental Health Issues

Having two children in primary school and one just started high school, I feel like a part of the furniture within the current primary school environment!   The school years are probably somewhat easier than the baby/toddler phase, yet they still come with their own set of challenges. All of our kids transitioned pretty smoothly from preschool/kinder to primary school; there were no tears on the first day for any of them, which I guess is a win, depending on your perspective! For our oldest child, his issues and tears started at the commencement of grade one.   I thought grade one would be easy, but that first week had my child crying and clinging to my leg; having to be pulled off me so I could go to work.   And there I was thinking I’d avoided all of that! His main issue, it seemed, was that he didn’t like his teacher.   This was the first year his teacher had been assigned to a grade 1 class; she had taught grade three and four for many years until now.   I think she simply
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PND Does NOT Mean You're Crazy!

It’s a great thing that there is so much more awareness now in relation to Post Natal Depression (PND).   While there is certainly still some stigma, it seems women are now more willing and comfortable with seeking help. I suffered PND with my first and third child.   The first time was horrendous and getting that initial help was a huge relief. But something that isn’t largely spoken of is Pre-Natal Depression.   I firmly believe that if I’d received counselling during my first pregnancy, my PND would not have hit me as hard as it did. For some women, being pregnant for the first time is a positive, happy experience.   The excitement of expecting a first child is often enough to forgive the morning sickness, the exhaustion, the discomfort.   For me, I had been at my peak fitness level for the first time in my life just before falling pregnant with our first.   By eight weeks, I had severe morning sickness.   Most mornings the nausea was so debilitating that I couldn’t even get o
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